Everything I could give is everything you couldn't take

I realized tonight that I forgot a few things.

One, I'm not terrible with people. If I put my mind to it, I can actually entertain and be entertained by new people. It's funny how I forget that I can be personable and witty and hold the attention of others. It pleases me to do so well.

Two, I am a good writer. Well, sometimes I don't think so, but when I muster the courage to share my writing, I always get positive feedback and that makes me feel a lot better about enjoying the whole art of writing.

Three, I wrote journal entries over winter break and only ever posted one. So to continue the trend, albeit, a little late, I shall include backlog #2 for your reading enjoyment.

With that, I think I've got few other little things I'd like to write before I sleep tonight, so I'm going to get back to that now.

Songs to consider:

Miserable At Best (Mayday Parade)
Yellow Cat (Slash) Red Cat (Say Anything)

Backlog Journal Entry #2 (26 December 2008, 11:37 PM)

Today had me thinking about alone time, about how much I wish for it when I can’t have it. I’m essentially stuck inside this…box with four other people who don’t care that they sit around and watch TV or play video games or sleep all day and don’t get one ounce of privacy. I suppose it’s not something that bothers a lot of people, but it bothers me. When I finally dragged myself out of sleep (I’d say bed, but I don’t actually have one of those), it was noon and something like sixty degrees outside. That’s right, sixty the day after Christmas. Absurd, one might say. So I pretty much bolted out the door once I managed to strap shoes on my feet and took off on my bike to enjoy the rare warm winter day. I hadn’t really given myself a chance to take a bike ride in a really long time so I naturally jumped at the opportunity. I ended up riding around some random road I didn’t know existed that looks straight out of a small country town. The houses are spaced far apart and the drives are all gravel. There are even a few places with horses and all other manner of farm life around. It was pleasant to get some fresh air and have a little bit of an adventure. I think I rode about two miles by the time all was said and done. It’s not much, but it felt good regardless. And since it was icy yesterday and sixty today, it was very wet out. I felt like I did when I was a kid riding my bike around after a big storm just to find all the big mud puddles to ride through. Though this time I avoided all manner of puddles, I still got pretty muddy what with all the water still on the roads. Sometimes I think it would be nice to have a splashguard on my back tire, but it’s so retro that I’m usually glad I don’t have one. At any rate, it was nice to get out for a bit and escape this box for once. It’s beginning to drive me mad that I can’t just go into a room and close the door and spend some time alone. Right now I’m having a hard time not feeling completely annoyed that I can’t just go for a walk or close a door to be by myself. I’m being forced to listen to a petty argument that makes me just want to grab the phone and hang it up. It’s so unnecessary sometimes to argue with people that I just don’t understand why it even starts in the first place. I would normally write to let out my irritation, but since that’s what I’m doing now and it’s just making me angrier that I can’t keep my focus, I might need to stop. Oh, well. I suppose that’s my cue to be proactive and leave my thoughts in my head for now. Until later…

Songs to consider:

So Cold (Breaking Benjamin)

Every now and again

Today is a music day. I suppose, being the last official day of freedom before my last semester start, I feel the need to do even less than normal during a school break. It hardly seems fair that after I graduate, I have to be a real adult and work and pay for things and clean all the time. I do all that now, but there's still plenty of time to waste doing nothing now and again. Heh. I can't say if I'll mind so much though. I've sort of been tired of the school part of school for the last three years or so. I suppose I'll be both happy and sad to go when the time comes. It's weird to think about, so I'm just going to...not. At least for now.

But like I said, a good day for music. It's so nice to just sit here and listen to music and read a book and occasionally speak with someone about trivial things. Makes everything feel so...normal. I'm also trying to think about classes tomorrow. I don't even have my first class until one in the afternoon and the just seems strange to me. What ever will I do with myself before that? Especially since after one, my day is full up until midnight. I guess I'll have those feelings tomorrow night when my first day is over. :)

Well, I'm going to go back to artfully wasting my time. I may even rearrange some furniture...just to make the flow of the room different. Enjoy your Sunday, whoever you may be.

Songs to consider:

Fall For You (Secondhand Serenade)
Anything (Mae)
Hotel Roosevelt (Augustana)